Children Carry More Than Backpacks

By Megan Soares, Bridge Builders Network Staff

When people hear the word refugee, they often picture long journeys, border crossings, or families arriving in a new country with few belongings. What we don't often picture are the children.

Children who have spent years adapting to circumstances no child should ever have to understand.

At Bridge Builders, we have the privilege of walking alongside refugee families as they build new lives in San Diego. One thing has become abundantly clear: children are remarkably resilient. They laugh easily, make friends quickly, and can find joy almost anywhere. But resilience should never be mistaken for the absence of pain.

Many Afghan children remember a childhood that looked very different from what we might imagine.

They remember playing soccer in dusty streets, chasing siblings through neighborhood parks, celebrating holidays with grandparents, and sharing meals with cousins. Afghanistan is not simply a place they fled- it is home. It is where their favorite memories, favorite foods, favorite games, and favorite people are rooted.

Yet woven into many of those memories are experiences no child should carry.

I remember one afternoon playing soccer with one of the young boys I would visit at his home. He was telling me about Afghanistan, and his face lit up as he described his favorite park back home. I asked what made it so special. He described it and told stories of him and his brothers.

"Oh yeah," he said matter-of-factly, "we were there when the bomb went off."

Then he immediately continued telling me about the playground as though he had just mentioned the weather.

He was seven years old.

The conversation stopped me in my tracks.

For him, it wasn't an extraordinary story. It was simply part of his childhood.

Moments like these remind us that trauma doesn't always announce itself. Sometimes it lives quietly beneath the surface; in the stories children tell without realizing how wild they sound to someone who has never lived through war.

Many refugee children have experienced loss, instability, dangerous journeys, long periods of uncertainty, and abrupt separation from everything familiar. Even after arriving in the United States, they continue navigating new schools, a new language, new cultural expectations, and the challenge of building friendships while carrying memories that many of their classmates cannot begin to understand.

And yet, something else stands out.

They want to talk. The boy in my story wanted to tell me about Afghanistan, the park, and the bomb.

When given a safe space, children often love sharing stories about Afghanistan. They proudly describe the mountains, the food, the games they played, their schools, their grandparents, and the places they miss. They want people to know where they came from. They want someone to listen.

Being heard is powerful.

When adults take the time to ask questions, listen without judgment, and show genuine curiosity, they communicate something every child deserves to know: Your story matters.

This is why investing in children is so important.

Investment isn't only about providing school supplies, tutoring, or after-school programs- although those things matter tremendously. It is also about investing time, relationships, encouragement, and consistency. It is about creating places where children can simply be children again while also honoring the experiences that have shaped them.

A caring mentor, a soccer game in the front yard, help with homework, an afternoon spent reading together; these moments may seem ordinary, but they build trust, confidence, and belonging. They remind children that they are seen not simply as refugees, but as kids with dreams, talents, personalities, and immense potential.

The future of every community depends on the children growing up within it.

When we invest in refugee children today, we are investing in tomorrow's teachers, healthcare workers, entrepreneurs, artists, engineers, and community leaders. We are helping young people heal while also equipping them to flourish.

At Bridge Builders, we believe every child deserves more than safety. Every child deserves to belong, to dream, to laugh freely, and to know that their voice matters.

Sometimes the most meaningful thing we can offer isn't a solution.

It's our willingness to listen.

And for many children who have experienced more than most adults ever will, that simple act can become the beginning of healing. As we gear up for back to school, it is important to remember that refugee children are carrying more than just a backpack when they walk into the room.